Now on to bigger and better things. In.....four....no wait, eight days, this chick and my girl group the chicklets will be winging our way to be the next episode of New York Housewives. Well maybe not the next episode but I will be hitting the concrete jungle for four fun filled days. Am I excited? HELL YES! For those of you who do not know, the Husband (yes for now he is one good behavior) generously treated the women in his life to a FABULOUS, EXTRAORDINARY, LUSH mini getaway for Emma, Abbie, Mom and I to visit the Big Apple. For this I am very grateful and thankful to have an opportunity to expose the kids to something out of the ordinary of our daily routine. THANK YOU HUSBAND!
So we leave on Em's birthday and I have plans for her to get the princess treatment. I got her a little crown, sash and scepter to wear on the airplane and we will be her court of ladies. I have mapped out a multitude of activities for us, Little Mermaid on Broadway, Central Park, the zoo, museums, Build -a - Bear, aquarium, Rockefeller Center, anything I can get to. I have bus schedules, taxi cab etiquette, and a little mini bottle of tequila in my pocket to medicate myself. I am ready for anything.
Lovely people, I need suggestions. My littlest daughter is not, NOT a fan of confined spaces. So much so, that she will not ride in elevators. A plane is a fast moving elevator reaching a cruising altitude of 35 thousand feet, for 6 hours. Is the picture becoming a little clearer? I do not fear for myself, I fear those poor people also caught in the tin can from the nether world of Hades who will suffer the shrill and penetrating screams of a 2 1/2 year old girl with a decibel level of 125 to start and moves up to permanent hearing loss at 194.
Now I have been working on her for weeks, relating the story of events so that it will not be so new, her synapses will have some kind of deja vous recall she has been there before and it was ok. But seriously, beyond the purple monkey blanket and a nuk nuk (yes the nuk nuk is lingering specifically for this trip for comfort, so sue me, dentist lady) how the Hades am I going to sooth this little angel? Hugs, check, soft mommy voice of comfort, check, re-explaining the events over and over and over again, check, food, check, toys, check, locking her and I in the bathroom at take off, check, offering free drinks to the rest of the passengers for the entire flight, check.
The answer is lots of kiddie drugs and a little luck (all this is for me) In lieu of that conclusion.
Start spreading the news, I'm leaving today.
I want to be a part of it, New York, New York.
These vagabond shoes, are longing to stray, and make a brand new start of it, New York, New York.
I want to wake up in the city that never sleeps.
To find I'm king of the hill, top of the heap.
These little town blues, are melting away.
I'll make a brand new start of it, in old New York.
If I can make it there,I'll make it anywhere.
It's up to you, New York, New York.
Music by John Kander
Lyrics by Frank Ebb