I have been flipping through the handbook all morning. NOTHING! You know, THE HANDBOOK? The handbook for moms with multiple daughters in the house. Yeah now I see the expression on your face change. THAT HANDBOOK. Well, the handbook has nothing on what I saw this morning. The feeling I have in my stomach is that I will be spending a lot of days with my hand over my forehead asking myself repeatedly "Why?"
This morning was not unlike any other morning before school. Kids up, working on getting dressed for the day. Nothing unusual right? WRONG. See this morning was tilted by a generous donation from a family friend of clothes to the kids. So I had gone through and separated by size (by the way 95% of the clothing was Bitsy LaRue size) and made little piles for each of the kids. Wonderful stuff, it is going to be great.
So Bits finally gets around and asked me if I would help her pick something out from "her" pile. I said yes and she wanted to wear leggings with a long sweater dress. Sure, why not, the kids are starting express themselves by what clothes they want to wear and hey it could be worse. So far I am lucky the worse thing they choose may be a mismatch shirt and pants, it's not like they want piercings or a mohawk. I have bigger battles to fight so I let it be. Bits is very happy and strutting around the house. She does look cute. How could she not, have you seen her? Then the Kat comes in and asked me to help her. Now her pile is a bit smaller (maybe 4 items) but there is a cute brown skirt and I say Kat you can wear this with some leggings and a long sleeve shirt. She complies and comes out looking Kat fab as usual.
What happened next was frightening. I could not move from my coffee or couch cushion. The Kat saunters up to Bits who is sitting at the table eating breakfast and says "How do I look?" and she pops her hip to the side. From the looongggg emphasis on the "I" it was on like Donkey Kong. I stopped breathing. The next few minutes of implied pleasantries between the sisters was booming like tympani drums in my head. Silky, ooozy, quietly sardonic words leaked from their lips. As Kat turned to get her breakfast I saw the smug smile on her lips, while Bits in the background gave her the "as if" once over as she walked away.
The encounter was over. I know it is only temporary. The upcoming conversation is coming quicker than I imagined. The whom will be cuter competition is here. As I sit here looking at the cover of the manual I try to imagine how I would write that chapter. I think I am doomed. I didn't grow up with a sister. I have sisters now, my friends are my sisters. Thank goodness we met as adults because if this is what goes down with young female sibs, Lord help the boys who attempt to date my daughters and Lord protect those girls whom try to out "SNAP!" Kat and Bits because they will eat them for lunch and dinner.
And for those of you wondering about the boy? Well he kept his head down, finished his food and went to put his shoes and socks on. How wonderfully, perfectly simple my boy is. He is so smart he makes himself invisible to the potential raging estrogen and I even got a good morning hug and kiss as he passed by.
Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer. ~ William S. Burroughs